Personal Boundaries

Hi everyone. Today I want to discuss one of the foundational principles of wellness coaching, the setting of personal boundaries. 

If you are someone who has caring responsibilities, perhaps for an elderly relative, or indeed for children, then it is likely that this will resonate with you. Sometimes we want to feel like we are available for everyone at all times, and this can be especially trying if you are not in employment. You can perhaps feel that you need to be doing chores and errands for others all the time. It is very easy, in these circumstances, to become overstretched. It becomes all too easy to forget about your own needs, perhaps neglecting your need to rest. You are working hard, even if not directly via employment: you are keeping your home and family together.

Here is one small suggestion of a boundary that you could put in place to make a start. Write down a few examples or situations of what you are having difficulty with, and see whether you would be able to say no to any of those. Sometimes we find it hard to push back and say no to people, especially when we might feel guilty. In fact, you are doing yourself a lot of good if you do say no and are able to put yourself first. You do need to have rest and balance, and to look after yourself physically and mentally. It is crucial to make the time to do that and not be always running around everyone else. It is so easy for you to slip into tiredness and burnout, and your physical health will suffer. 

Another option might be to consider who might be able to help you? Who could assist with all of the commitments that you have? Is there anyone that you could delegate work to so that it is not all on your shoulders? This can be hard, particularly if you are a sole carer, but you still can and need to create the time to look after yourself. Personal boundaries are incredibly important and mustn’t be forgotten. Whether you are a parent, carer, partner, friend, or managing a home full time, unpaid work is still work. Emotional labour is still labour and burnout doesn’t only happen in paid employment. 

If this resonates with you, then you can click HERE to find out more about me, and you can follow this blog to discover much more information, tips and strategies in the coming weeks.